26-year-old Kevin E. Gillman of Ohio who weighs almost 500 pounds decided to go to Walmart, and rides one of their motorized shopping scooters.
But for whatever reason, Kevin decided to use that motorized scooter for some LOW-SPEED SHOPLIFTING. [DUMB DUMMY]
First Kevin grabbed some paint. Then he drove himself to the clothing section, threw some paint on the clothes, and SET THEM ON FIRE. That fire was SUPPOSED to be a distraction while Kevin stole electronics. [DUMB DUMMY]
But the fire created CHAOS . . . and the store's front door got locked, which blocked him from escaping. Yes, Walmart's door got locked during a fire, trapping everyone in. But that's an issue for another day.
Anyway Big Kev was arrested for aggravated arson and petty theft. [DUMB DUMMY]